But I feel equally guilty for not writing here in so long that it is keeping me from returning.
These are the silly thoughts that reside in my head.
I’m going to try to ignore those silly thoughts and instead remember in the time I’ve been away that I birthed the cutie below and the season that we are currently in is hectic. So, I should be gentle.
All this to say, I’m working on writing things and those things will return to this screen soon.
It’s August 1st. I’m very aware of that…but summer is over, y’all. Just ask all the stores who have busted out their back-to-school sales…or Halloween displays.
I’ve worked by an academic calendar for most of my life and August, though it tries to parade as a summer month, is anything but. It’s prep month. It’s that time on Sunday evening when you frantically do all the homework you’ve been putting off all weekend and really start the hateful thoughts toward Monday morning. I’m not a fan of August.
Except that I am. The end of July/ start of August is full of the happiest memories for me and my family. We purchased our home on July 25th. My birthday July 26th which is also our engagement anniversary (he proposed on my birthday…cause he’s awesome). August 1st is our wedding anniversary. We remember and we celebrate a lot during this time, which I really need.
Gearing up for another year is exciting and terrifying all wrapped into one. We’re going to gain a family member this fall. Both Matt and I are going to be going through work changes. Our day to day routine is going to be shaken. We are going to be in sleepless newborn land again. And those are only the things that I’m aware of, who knows what else will be coming!
So, I’m grateful and angry and anxious for this time of year and trying to find a way to be ok with that. Balance has never been my strong point, but I’m getting better…and praying a lot.
I turn 30 tomorrow and looking back over the past 30 years of my life, these are the people/events/things that have shaped who I am today. Some of them are silly, some of them are serious, some specific, some more general but all of them hold a special place in my heart:
(PS I’m very pregnant…obviously these things are in no other order than “baby brain”)
Meeting and marrying a man that is even more perfect than I could ever dream up
Two beautiful daughters
Loving and supportive parents and family
Diving deeper into a faith I’ve been blessed to have been a part of since birth
A wonderful college experience and degree (go, Juniata!)
Moving to Erie, PA
My first “big girl” job at Gannon University
My present jobs/ministries that allow me to both feed and clothe my family while doing something truly important and meeting some fantastic people
Supportive friends who fluidly move in and out of my life as needed but are never too far
Breaking (and repairing) my right leg in the strangest fashion (always a good story)
The graces of the 5 sacraments I have received thus far that help me daily
Buying our home
Leading several service-based mission trips, all of which have their own stories and memories
Beginning (and finishing soon, God willing) my Masters degree
Our honeymoon in Jamaica
Growing up in a small town surrounded by family
Getting my driver’s license
Joining the wonderful world of essential oils
The complete life of my dog, Lola
Social media. Love it, hate it or anywhere in between, it’s been a big part of my 20’s.
The weekend we bought a house, moved, went on a road trip and got engaged…and then napped
Finding and sticking with a therapist who “gets” me
Learning (and continuing to learn) how to be a wife and a mother as a team with my husband
Discovering that I actually do like (some) writing and using it as self care
My trip to Ireland
Nights where I couldn’t see through all the tears…and the tomorrows that still appeared regardless of how I was feeling
Family vacations to Rehoboth
The multiple rejections throughout the years
Learning to not only accept, but love, myself (to be continued…forever)