Mother’s Day weekend 2018

I “millennial read” (ie saw the headline and read the first paragraph) of an article that claimed that the woman who founded Mother’s Day kind of regretted starting the day after all was said and done. I sympathize. This was my 3rd total Mother’s Day, 2nd with a baby outside the womb, and probably the best experience so far.

Last year, the tension in my marriage and family life was so high, I spent more of the day crying than smiling. My expectations this year, then, were super low.

And in all honesty, it wasn’t like I magically got everything I’ve ever dreamed of this year, but something felt different, felt better. We were in a better place as a family definitely, but I think, more than that, I was in a different place spiritually.

I’m trying to be open and trusting right now in my life and it is the one of the hardest tasks I’ve ever taken on. To be honest, I’m failing more than I’m flying. Closing my true self off to the world has apparently been my MO for a while. Old habits die hard.

But, as the wonderful gifts my hubby (and my girls) got for me indicate, though I still need a lot of interior work, I have some awesome guides to lean on along the way.

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Day-to day-mothering isn’t easy. Life isn’t easy. But, boy, it’s worth it, even just to see my (almost!) two-year-old pretending to be a duck at a spontaneous zoo trip or the simple Mass and brunch as a family that started our Sunday.

I am truly blessed.

 

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